Tehran, October 8 - Officials of the Islamic Republic of Iran continued to tout the use of a corrugated likeness of the country’s Supreme Leader instead of producing actual proof that the man even lives, with the observation that the likeness still shows more vitality than the previous US president, and that the US never produced any proof of like for that president, either.

In the seven months since U.S. and Israeli strikes killed Ayatollah Ali Khamenei and left his son and successor unseen, the republic has offered substitutes in descending order of thickness. A cleric told regional television that Mojtaba had been pulled from the rubble of a Tehran hospital after the hospital itself was bombed. A handwritten note to the commander of the IRGC Aerospace Force appeared with a signature dated August and a distribution line dated July. President Masoud Pezeshkian reported a meeting of seven hours; the Leader’s office later described a shorter engagement and released no image of either. The board, by contrast, has kept a single posture, has not had to be retrieved from under masonry, and has not required a second piece of paper to explain the first.

Nor, however, has the cardboard cutout wandered offstage aimlessly at a random moment, unlike a certain US chief executive.

“We might not want to expose our Supreme Leader to attack,” acknowledged a spokesman for President Masoud Pezeshkian. “But we do notice that our cartonian representation does not have a tendency to mumble incoherently, and that has certain advantages.”

Mr. Biden’s former aides called the comparison frivolous. They noted that the former president had attended meetings in person, allegedly possessed a pulse, and left several stages under his own power, if not always along the planned vector. “Cardboard does not take questions either,” one scheduler said, “but we never claimed it was running a war.” The cutout has issued no statements. Statements continue to appear under Mojtaba’s name.

Analysts foresee some difficulty in continued deployment of the cardboard Khamenei, as US pressure on Iranian shipping continues, and sanctions have all but cut off Iran from the air, as well. Experts explained that the regime will struggle to find the fuel to transport the cardboard image to all the planned propaganda events where it would normally appear. “Also, if something happens to it,” warned news agency FARS commentator Fidmi Samjizz, “the resources may simply not be available to replace it.”

Biden, however, might be for hire as a passable stand-in.

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